I never realize how truly lucky I am to have so many compassionate, loving people in my life. I never realized how important I am to others. Between twitter, Facebook and the abundance of phone calls and text messages I received, it was apparent that SOMEBODY on this here earth loves the hell out of me. I think it is amazing to go from a point in my life where I think not to many like me, to having so many people love me. I am always so humbled when people give me compliments about how "amazing" I am or "special" or "inspiring" or whatever beautiful word they so choose to describe ME! Why? I suppose it's because I don't think I deserve gratitude for being myself.
I don't mean that in a "I AM great, which is why people should call me that" or in any other self centered way. What I mean is, I never thought that me, just being me, could make such an impact on other people the way it does. I don't go out trying to inspire people or trying to be someone they look up to or anything of that nature. All I do is hope that someone will see me and take something from our conversation. I always say that I am broken. In all honesty, I am. I am not a whole at this point in my life and I don't think I have ever been whole in my life. And if I have, it was for such a short period of time. I find it incredible that people can see past this broken girl that I am, who has been through so much in so little time, and somehow see greatness in that. I don't see it as any of the great things that people have said in the past or today. I just see it as being myself.
The greatest thing about today, is not only knowing that if something were to happen to me right now, people would see past my flaws and see something greater than myself. And for that, I am totally blessed. I mean, to think I was almost going to be mopping around today being upset about things that I can be upset about on another day. It shouldn't take a birthday for me to see that people do care, I just need to stop caring about those who actually don't care about me. So, thank you to everyone who participated in making me feel like the most loved girl in the world. You did an incredible job. I love you for that.
<3
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