Good-bye April

Good-bye April and HELLO MAY! In truth, I am not sad to see April go! There has been so much happening in my life lately and I am ready to close this chapter. April is always hectic for me particularly because of finals and bringing the semester to a close. It was especially hectic this year around because I was dealing with a lot within myself. I was going through a really tough time and trying to deal with it in addition to dealing with the crazy weather that April brought along with it wasn't making it any better for me.

Throughout the month I've been challenged with dealing with "losing". I haven't been meeting my standards that I've set for myself and I haven't been able to grasp the opportunities that I worked toward. My grades turned out to be great but I still fell short of my own standards. This semester taught me a lot about dealing with adversity when things don't go the way they are planned. I have high expectations all the time but I never saw them as unattainable. When my goals weren't met, instead of thinking they were unattainable, I questioned my capabilities. Because of this consistent rain cloud that was hovering over my head, I felt like the rain was teasing me. The rain was a direct reflection of the rain cloud I seemed to carry around with me throughout this month.

Through all of this, I couldn't help but think about the saying "April showers bring May Flowers". Without all of this crappy weather we've been having we wouldn't be able to have the beautiful flowers that we love to see when the weather gets nice and the sun decides to return. We always complain about the rain but we never thank it. I began to apply this to my crazy life this April.  The rain cloud that I had following me was destined to be there. I mean, how else can the flowers of May grow? I had to understand that all things work together for good and that even though things seemed like they weren't working out, they were working together for what's best for me.

I always get caught up in the fact that something didn't go my way as opposed to looking at the benefit of what did happen. Just like May flowers, we all will face times that will be trying. It is the lessons from those trying times that will allow us to bloom into the flowers that we are destined to be. I may not see that April was a success but I am thankful for what I have learned and what I am still learning.

With that being said, I know May has some awesome things in store for me, I will just have to wait and see what God has planned.